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El Viejo
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Perks of reaching 60 or being over 70 and heading towards 80!

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

4. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out..

8. You can eat supper at 4 pm.

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

19. You can't remember who sent you this list.

And Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
 

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Saved by Jesus Blessed by God
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And Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. __________________

:eek::eek:
 

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I learn that the older you get...



















what were we talking about?!?!
 
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I resemble all of those remarks!!:D
 

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Reminds me of an old Rodney Dangerfield saying,,,(God Rest His Soul),,,"The great thing about having Alzheimers is that everyday you wake up and make new friends"
 

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El Viejo
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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Wimmins give up trying to jump ya bones...
Not necesarrily, Frank.. Kinda depends on how much REAL 'greenies' ya got. :rolleyes:

I get away with it by farting around old people. They always get the blame. :biggrin:
Got that covered too, Rip...Always got the dawg with me and can blame it on her.. Matter of face, she's sittin' here in the easy chair with me right now watching the game...and she just slipped out a 'quiet one' that would clear most middle sized rooms...:rotfl:
 

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Not necesarrily, Frank.. Kinda depends on how much REAL 'greenies' ya got. :rolleyes:

Got that covered too, Rip...Always got the dawg with me and can blame it on her.. Matter of face, she's sittin' here in the easy chair with me right now watching the game...and she just slipped out a 'quiet one' that would clear most middle sized rooms...:rotfl:
Jim makes his dog do this every morning.:rotfl:
 

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El Viejo
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23,417 Posts
Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Jim makes his dog do this every morning.:rotfl:
LMAO,Bobby.. I gave that a shot..but she still 'commits perjury' every day SOMEWHERE here in the casa....:headknock
 
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