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AKA MUNGAM WORC
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I saw a thread about offshore calamity's Lets hear your best hunting F-Ups.
 

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AKA MUNGAM WORC
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Discussion Starter · #3 · (Edited)
Ducks,Boats,Planes Jack Daniels and East Matty Oysters

Two years ago my hunting partner Fast Eddie and I went down to my dads place down @ Sargent to try our hand @ duckhunting.(We arrived on Friday, two days before the BIG SNOW storm blew through Sargent.)I kept telling FAST that a big cold front was coming and we were gonna slaughter e'm.
Well the first afternoon we spent getting ready for the "Great Sargent Duck Hunt"We scrounged up some matirials to build a blind consisting of blue Dow styrofoam insulation board,a few sticks, 2 stools, an old moving blanket, and some camo netting.Then we loaded our spread of dekes and 1 old propane heater happend to be in my deke bag.My Dad is not a hunter but he went along with us,to go set up our spread and decoys.
Earlier that summer I went fishing @ "THE BLOW OUT HOLE" and I recalled a little Island just inside the bay there.We made the long run in our skiff to set up there for the next day.I put out 40-50 dekes built the blind,and we were set.
Fast and I woke up Sat am @ 430 am to rain & storms but that was not gonna stop us.We made it to Linda's and road out the storms till daylight.There were several diehards there too so we made some new freinds while we waited,but the skys cleared and off we went.I again told Fast how great it was gonna be cause them duckys were gonna be coming in like kamikazi's on the leading edge of the big front.
We finally made it to our blind by 8 am and it was hot and humid,and not a duck in the sky.I kept reminding Fast that the front should bring in the birds and just be ready.He reminded me of our last Duck hunt and was starting to get the itch to go fishing instead.Well,I should have listened to him.
At around 12 am the "Big Cold Front"came in like the Tasmanian Devil.We found ourselves in high winds,heavy rains and thunderbolts were busting all around us.(Fast Eddie is not scared of much but I do know he is scared of lightning and I will never forget the look on his face when all the thunder bolts were cracki'n all around.)we both lay flat on the ground untill the worst had passed.
Well a few ducks had buzzed us so we got in the blind to try to make a hunt of it.By now it was cold and gettin colder w/winds blowin the **** out of us.I remember checking out the crack in the blind to make sure the boat was ok.We were just about to give up when I peeped out the back of the blind and the boat was GONE.(Fast had put the anchor out with only a few feet of rope out and when the tide came in my boat floated away.)I knew we were in trouble but Fast tried to wade out to get the boat and only made it 40 yds.cause the soft mud bottom mixed w/razor sharp oysters.I called him back and we got back in our blind to regroup.I stated the heater up and we were riding out some more heavy rain,but we were able to get somewhat dry and and we had a heater.
It was getting late and I knew If we didn't get help soon we would be in for along night on that Island.I called my Dad first since he was the only one that knew where we were but he had left the phone in the boathouse and did not pickup, so I called the coast gaurd,a fishing guide and 2 oyster shuckers from Matagorda.I figured at least one of them would get to us,and we were cold.First man to the rescue gets $5oo bucks I told them.The fishing guide went to get Dad so he could lead them too us.(We were lucky to have cell service cause i never get service east of Sargent)
The Coast Gaurd plane flew by us twice and missed seeing us.The Oyster shuckers were coming from Matagrda and Dad has a bad memory so we waited and waited and you get the idea.We were getti'n scared w/temps forcast in the mid 20s on the way.All I could think about is getting Fast out of this mess I had gotten him into cause he has 2 little ones @ home that need him and Jen (his wife) might not let him come hunting w/me again if I brought him home frozen or hurt.
We finally spotted the oyster shuckers boat and made contact on the cell phone.We were hooping it up like we had just won a football game in the last two seconds.Fast was waving the moving blanket like a Bashee Indian and I started to collect my Dekes and tear down our blind to ready ourselves to be rescued.Just my luck,the tide and N wind blew most of the water outof the bay,and the oyster boat got STUCK too! tying to get to us.We went from high five jubilation to scared sh**tless in a hurry.We quickly rebuild the blind and crank the heater on while we contemplated our next move.
Finally the Coast Gaurd showed up and so did my dad and the fishing guide.The oyster shuckers finally made it to us and we were saved just in the nick of time.Dad and the guide retrieved our boat and the C gaurd didn't do much.
On the way back to Sargent our rescurers gave us shots of Jack Daniels Whiskey and fresh East Matagorda oysters they had harvested earlier as chasers.Those guys were two tough amigos and we thanked them all the way home.Back at the house we fed them a kings meal and paid the $500 I had promised them.I also had to pay the fishing guide $250 for getting our boat,but I was glad to do it.I quit duck hunting after that.Happy hunting and stay safe everybody.Crowmagnum
 

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AKA MUNGAM WORC
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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Sorry Charlie

Charles Helm said:
I believe that you are supposed to start since this is your thread!:rotfl:
Sorry Charlie it took me a while had 2 buds show up to bother me.
 

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crowmagnum said:
Sorry Charlie it took me a while had 2 buds show up to bother me.
Hey! Charlie is a tuna, it's just Charles.

I've hunted in blowing sleet more than once, and I've hunted when it was so cold that I was freezing inside the camphouse next to the wood stove inside two sleeping bags, but at least I was never on the water at the same time!

There were a couple of South Texas trips that should been skipped because of rain, including one where I stuck my truck to the frame going down to the creek to see how high it was
, and one where I had water coming over the hood of the same truck on the county road driving out of the ranch. Just a couple of reasons I don't like hunting South Texas when it rains.:cloud:

It took two guys to pull my truck out that day. The first one got stuck trying to get me out, and then after the second guy pulled him out they both hooked up to pull me out. After the tow strap (used strap from a construction site) broke once.
 

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Classic Stupidity

My buddy and I were Spring Turkey hunting at my lease after a day of good rain it had cleared up. We had a gobbler respond right @ sun up so we scrambled to get into position--I was doing the calling so no gun in hand. As I turn to sit down I hear the very distinguishing sound of a rattlesnake. It looks to be a pretty big snake and it is coiled and ready to strike--I jump back as far as I can and he strikes as I jump not really getting close to me. Well since my buddy had the gun and dumbazz me doesn't want to spook the gobbler so I take a big rock and slam the rattler right on the head and his rattling slows to a stop-I ASSume he is dead. I move a few yards away and continue calling-the bird comes in and we take him about 30 minutes later. I tell my buddy the story and he says he wants to skin the snake for his son. No problem so I go back to the snake which is still smashed into the MUD with the rock on his head. I reach down and pick it up and it instantly comes back to life--I luckily had grabbed him just close enough to his head so he couldn't bite me. I was scared sh...less and was afraid to let the dang thing go for fear he might get me before I can get away--I finally toss him to the side and my buddy pops him with the shotgun. Oh how stupid that was but someone was definitely looking out for me that day.
 

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I won a sales contest where the first prize was a spring turkey hunt on the Baylor ranch near Cotulla in La Salle county. Man, I was pumped, hunting in south Texas! The foreman warned us about lots of snakes, and that they had been having some trouble with illegals crossing the ranch, and desperate. He let me out before dawn and said he would be back around noon. I ahd me 12 guage and a 22 pistol holstered at my belt. I stumbled into some wild hogs as I neared the river, which I wasn't expecting. I jumped sideways in the dark. I was wearing some of those hard plastic snake chaps and when I landed it dug into my ankle, spraining it badly. I limped along, hitting the call, but not getting any response. As it got light I realized that all the growth was the same height. I really couldn't tell where the river was, which was supposed to be my bearing point. I didn't worry too much, I had always prided myself on not getting turned around in the outdoors, bad mistake. It got mid morning, the ankle was hurting BAD and I realized I was lost. I had no idea which way to head. I stumbled through a makeshift camp, with a discarded pack of Mexican cigarettes and an empty can of beans, opened with a knife. It was kind of spooky, not knowing if I had surprised them. Not to worry, I thought, as I patted my little sidearm, that was NO LONGER THERE! Great, I thought, some branch or something had took my pistol. OK, not cool. I was lost, hurt, hot and worried. Then as an added indignity, mother nature called. No tp, no soft grass around. Everything I saw had thorns or stickers, unbelievable. So, I sacrificed my turkey gloves, this was getting bleak. I couold tell it was near noon by the sun. I had no idea how far I was from the pickup point, but it could be miles. In desperation, I got up on a corner fencepost and asked the Man upstairs for a little help. I got down and walked about another 100 yards and lo and behold!! I was there, right where he let me out. 10 minutes later he was there. I never told them what had happened, but now you know.
 

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Ever find your pistol?

Lots of folks tell me they have a perfect sense of direction and never get lost. However, South Texas brush is real easy to get turned around in.
 

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One of my many was when I first started to learn hunting. I had joined a 'hunting club' and wanted to try archery. I had target practiced several times and thought I'd give it a go. I talked to the ranch foreman who told me about an old archery stand that was down a particular trail. So off I went. After an hour and a half of looking up trees I finally found it. Half the wooden steps were missing but I was able to finally make my way up. I get on the platform and spread my gear around and get my bow ready for some action. Well, 20 minutes later a deer shows up. I gently bring my bow up and lean forward to take aim of my first archery deer. Just then the deer takes a couple of steps and I have to lean a little more forward for a better shot. Well that was all it took. As I was leaning even further the boards snap and I go falling to the ground still holding my bow. I remembered as I was falling that the deer was just as shocked as I was. By the time I hit the ground the deer was long gone and so was my breath. Man, that hurt! Lesson learned, never trust a tree stand that a. has missing steps and b. you didn't build yourself.
 

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No, Charles, I never found it. But after that I fully understood how people trying to cross that area on foot don't make it. Page two is that, since I wasn't successful there they sent me on up to the Dudley Bros. ranch near Coleman where I scored on a big double bearded gob which they paid to have mounted flying for me.
 

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activescrape said:
No, Charles, I never found it. But after that I fully understood how people trying to cross that area on foot don't make it. Page two is that, since I wasn't successful there they sent me on up to the Dudley Bros. ranch near Coleman where I scored on a big double bearded gob which they paid to have mounted flying for me.
That's too bad about the pistol!
 

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O.K. Here's a recent "adventure". Troy, Brian and I head up to the lease in north Texas about 6 weeks ago to build feeder pens, move feeders, get things set up for the summer feed program, you get the picture. We get to Abeline late because Troy has to stop and eat 5-6 times on the way up. He's a work out freak and has to get his protein! So we stay in Abeline and head up to the ranch early. We arrive and do a quick check of the camp to find someone has broken into the camper. In the process they shut the door and have jammed the lock so we can't get it open. 45 minutes later we get the door pried open and find they've stolen my toolbox and tools, eaten some food and left a mess. Get that cleaned up and the door fixed. We head off to do some work. I'm in the back seat and see a 4 1/2' rattler lying on the side of the road. I tell Troy to stop so I can kill the snake. I hop out and reach in the back of the truck for something to whack the snake. First thing I find is a set of limb loppers. This particular pair has the extendable handles. When they are extended the handles are about 30" long and closed about 18". They are closed (that's important!). Troy, being the big tough, stupid, body builder says," Hey I'm gonna catch him". and grabs the loppers out of my hand. He then walks up to the snake, which has decided to leave and is crawling away, and grabs him with the loppers. Now the snakes 4+ feet long and Troy grabs him about 2-3" from the rattles with enough force to cut the snake. The snake does what anything pinched by a pair of loppers being wielded a moron would do, he bites Troy on the hand. Troy, being a brain surgeon, drops the snake and starts screaming he's been bit. I grab him, constrict the blood flow to his arm, squeeze out as much blood as I can from the fangs wounds, ice his hand and load him in the truck. We hunt on a LARGE ranch, it's 12 miles just to get off the ranch and to a blacktop road so I start driving as fast as I can. At this point I'm worried about Troy because he's over there moaning and groaning and his arms swelling up like a pi*** off toad frog. We make it to the highway and head for the nearest hospital, 45miles away at a high rate of speed. I go about 10 miles and start making jokes about getting pulled over, come over a hill and sure enough theres a DPS Trooper working radar. Lights us up and I pull over, explain situation and that I'm peace officer also. He sends us on our way and radio's ahead to let the hospital know we are coming. We get to the hospital and they check Troy out. Nothing new for them, they get 10-12 snake bites a year. Start anti-venom treatment and prepare to transfer Troy to Lubbock. I talk to the doctor. He says we did a good job with constricting blood flow and icing the bite to slow the venom. Troy's going to be fine but will have to stay the night in Lubbock. Troy's now grinning like a possum because he knows he's not gonna die and thinks he'll have a " I got bit by a rattler" story to tell. Says to me and Brian," Why don't you go ahead and take care of the work on the lease while I'm in the hospital". I realize Brian and I just got scre***. He's going to lay up and charm the nurses while we work our tails off. Being a true friend I pull one of the ambulance attendants that's doing the transfer aside. I give him $20 and have him tell Troy that the side effects of the anti-venom treatment normally wear off after a few weeks. Knowing Troy's first question (What side effect?) I get him to tell Troy the anti-venom causes erectil disfunction and lowered testosterone levels for a few weeks but normally the effects wear off. Brian and I go back to the lease work our tails off and pick Troy up from the hospital the next afternoon. He's fine, hugh swelling in his arm, but doing great. Except now he's worried about the side effects. We let it ride for a wihle before spilling the beans. He took it well. By the way. Don't get bit by a rattlesnake unless you have good insurance. Cost of anti-venom treatment and 1 night in the hospital $18,000.
 

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AKA MUNGAM WORC
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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
tokavi said:
O.K. Here's a recent "adventure". Troy, Brian and I head up to the lease in north Texas about 6 weeks ago to build feeder pens, move feeders, get things set up for the summer feed program, you get the picture. We get to Abeline late because Troy has to stop and eat 5-6 times on the way up. He's a work out freak and has to get his protein! So we stay in Abeline and head up to the ranch early. We arrive and do a quick check of the camp to find someone has broken into the camper. In the process they shut the door and have jammed the lock so we can't get it open. 45 minutes later we get the door pried open and find they've stolen my toolbox and tools, eaten some food and left a mess. Get that cleaned up and the door fixed. We head off to do some work. I'm in the back seat and see a 4 1/2' rattler lying on the side of the road. I tell Troy to stop so I can kill the snake. I hop out and reach in the back of the truck for something to whack the snake. First thing I find is a set of limb loppers. This particular pair has the extendable handles. When they are extended the handles are about 30" long and closed about 18". They are closed (that's important!). Troy, being the big tough, stupid, body builder says," Hey I'm gonna catch him". and grabs the loppers out of my hand. He then walks up to the snake, which has decided to leave and is crawling away, and grabs him with the loppers. Now the snakes 4+ feet long and Troy grabs him about 2-3" from the rattles with enough force to cut the snake. The snake does what anything pinched by a pair of loppers being wielded a moron would do, he bites Troy on the hand. Troy, being a brain surgeon, drops the snake and starts screaming he's been bit. I grab him, constrict the blood flow to his arm, squeeze out as much blood as I can from the fangs wounds, ice his hand and load him in the truck. We hunt on a LARGE ranch, it's 12 miles just to get off the ranch and to a blacktop road so I start driving as fast as I can. At this point I'm worried about Troy because he's over there moaning and groaning and his arms swelling up like a pi*** off toad frog. We make it to the highway and head for the nearest hospital, 45miles away at a high rate of speed. I go about 10 miles and start making jokes about getting pulled over, come over a hill and sure enough theres a DPS Trooper working radar. Lights us up and I pull over, explain situation and that I'm peace officer also. He sends us on our way and radio's ahead to let the hospital know we are coming. We get to the hospital and they check Troy out. Nothing new for them, they get 10-12 snake bites a year. Start anti-venom treatment and prepare to transfer Troy to Lubbock. I talk to the doctor. He says we did a good job with constricting blood flow and icing the bite to slow the venom. Troy's going to be fine but will have to stay the night in Lubbock. Troy's now grinning like a possum because he knows he's not gonna die and thinks he'll have a " I got bit by a rattler" story to tell. Says to me and Brian," Why don't you go ahead and take care of the work on the lease while I'm in the hospital". I realize Brian and I just got scre***. He's going to lay up and charm the nurses while we work our tails off. Being a true friend I pull one of the ambulance attendants that's doing the transfer aside. I give him $20 and have him tell Troy that the side effects of the anti-venom treatment normally wear off after a few weeks. Knowing Troy's first question (What side effect?) I get him to tell Troy the anti-venom causes erectil disfunction and lowered testosterone levels for a few weeks but normally the effects wear off. Brian and I go back to the lease work our tails off and pick Troy up from the hospital the next afternoon. He's fine, hugh swelling in his arm, but doing great. Except now he's worried about the side effects. We let it ride for a wihle before spilling the beans. He took it well. By the way. Don't get bit by a rattlesnake unless you have good insurance. Cost of anti-venom treatment and 1 night in the hospital $18,000.
Great read tokavi! The more you hunt better yu'll feel!Looks like ya'll had it all,FUN ROAD TRIP,MINOR SLOWDOWNS,CROOKS ,MAJOR FUN,BUXOM NURSE'S,RATTLE SNAKES,PRACTICLE JOKES, mixed in with a,LOT OF STUPID RED NECKNESS.Can I go hunting W/ ya'll next year? HE!HE!
 

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From this past February:

Monday morning right after the South Texas daybreak I hear a bark/growl and glance up to see a brown/grey juvenile Snow Goose glide over me. I jerk the gun up and start to swing on the bird (which is now behind me...always a high percentage shot
) and before I can get the gun shouldered good the goose LANDS in the decoys and is standing about 25 yards away from me.


O.K. goose we'll do it your way...I start to walk over to the goose to put it up and the bird, sensing the mortal threat that a fat camoclad figure with a 10 gauge automatic shotgun presented, walked behind a big Blue Goose decoy and peered over the back of it to figure out what was going on. I closed to 10 yards and the goose RAN from behind the decoy to ANOTHER decoy and hid behind it...then another & another as I continued to close. Finally the goose ran out of decoys to hide behind and as I walked to within 10 yards of the bird it finally flew, at that point I fired at the bird 3 times (#2 Hevi-shot @ $2.25 per shell) and the last time I saw the bird it was still flying towards to the Hudson Bay.


Brought all the decoys up from the camp for a washing and detail paint before putting them away for the season. It was a fair one.
 

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crazy stuff

I hate to admit it but some of my regular "crew" have this type of adventure on a regular basis. We go up to the lease to "work" about every other month. Should be heading up sometime in July. We normally do a 3-4 day trip so we have plenty of time, it takes about 9 hours to drive upfrom Houston. PM if you want to come up. We have plenty of hogs that need to be relocated to a freezer!
 

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This is a true story,
The names were changed to protect their ID's
This is a documented tale
Don't try this at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



















Na better not, It's bad and it has to do with fecies, the human kind.
 
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