2 Cool Fishing Forum banner

1 - 6 of 6 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
26,148 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
TXZ195>198-210>213-226-227-235-071215-
/O.CON.KHGX.HZ.W.0002.100108T0300Z-100110T1500Z/
/O.CON.KHGX.WI.Y.0001.100107T1200Z-100108T0000Z/
AUSTIN-BRAZOS-BURLESON-COLORADO-FORT BEND-GRIMES-HARRIS-JACKSON-
WALLER-WASHINGTON-WHARTON-
INCLUDING THE CITIES OF...BELLVILLE...BRENHAM...BROOKSHIRE....
BRYAN...CALDWELL...COLLEGE STATION...COLUMBUS...EAGLE LAKE....
EDNA...EL CAMPO...HEMPSTEAD...HOUSTON...HUMBLE...KATY...
LAKE SOMERVILLE...MISSOURI CITY...NAVASOTA...PASADENA...PIERCE...
PRAIRIE VIEW...RICHMOND...ROSENBERG...SEALY...SUGAR LAND...
TOMBALL...WEIMAR...WHARTON
1011 PM CST WED JAN 6 2010

...WIND ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM 6 AM TO 6 PM CST
THURSDAY...
...HARD FREEZE WARNING REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM 9 PM THURSDAY TO
9 AM CST SUNDAY...

A HARD FREEZE WARNING REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM 9 PM THURSDAY TO
9 AM CST SUNDAY. A WIND ADVISORY REMAINS IN EFFECT FROM 6 AM TO
6 PM CST THURSDAY.

AN ARCTIC B*TCH OF A COLD FRONT WILL RACE THROUGH SOUTHEAST TEXAS EARLY
THURSDAY MORNING. HIGH TEMPERATURES ON THURSDAY WILL OCCUR AROUND
SUNRISE...WITH TEMPERATURES FALLING TO THE 30S DURING THE DAY.
LOW TEMPERATURES ON FRIDAY MORNING WILL FALL TO THE LOWER "FREEZE YOUR PECKERS OFF".
NORTH OF A BRENHAM TO CONROE TO CLEVELAND LINE...MID "COLDER THAN A WITCH'S TIT".

METRO AREA...AND UPPER FROZEN FISH IN COASTAL COUNTIES. STRONG WINDS WILL
PRODUCE WIND CHILL VALUES BETWEEN F*ING COLD AND VERY, VERY F*ING COLD THURSDAY NIGHT
AND FRIDAY MORNING.

HIGH TEMPERATURES ON FRIDAY WILL ONLY RANGE IN THE "I CAN FEEL MY FACE" TO "THE COLOR IS COMING BACK INTO MY FINGERTIPS".

THE NORTHERN HALF OF SOUTHEAST TEXAS NORTH OF A LINE FROM
COLUMBUS TO CONROE TO CLEVELAND WILL LIKELY ENDURE F*ING COLD ARSE TEMPERATURES THAT WOULD FREEZE THE BALLS OFF OF A BUFFALO. RESIDENTS ARE ADVISED TO KEEP THEIR ASSES INDOORS AND TO STAY HOME FROM WORK BOTH THURSDAY AND FRIDAY. MAKE LOVE OR JUST LOVE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH. BE ADVISED TO WRAP THE PIPE(S). CALL YOUR EMPLOYER AND ADVISE THEM OF THE FACT THAT THE RADIATOR IN YOUR CAR BURST BUT THE TOW TRUCK GUY PROMISED IT WOULD BE FIXED MONDAY MORNING. OPEN THE LIQUOR CABINET AND DRINK UP, BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT.

42 CONSECUTIVE HOURS OF SUBFREEZING TEMPERATURES FROM EARLY
THURSDAY EVENING UNTIL MIDDAY SATURDAY.

STRONG NORTH WINDS WILL DEVELOP EARLY THURSDAY MORNING IN THE
WAKE OF THE FRONT. NORTH WINDS WILL INCREASE TO 20 TO 30 MPH...
WITH GUSTS OF HOLY TOLEDO TO HELLO WIZARD EXPECTED. THE WINDS ARE EXPECTED TO
DIMINISH TO BELOW 20 MPH AROUND SUNSET.

PRECAUTIONARY/PREPAREDNESS ACTIONS...

A HARD FREEZE WARNING MEANS SUB-FREEZING TEMPERATURES ARE LIKELY.
RESIDENTS SHOULD PREPARE FOR EXTENDED PERIODS OF FREEZING
TEMPERATURES FROM LATE THURSDAY AFTERNOON THROUGH SUNDAY MORNING.
THESE CONDITIONS COULD KILL CROPS AND OTHER SENSITIVE VEGETATION LIKE OUR GOVERNMENTAL EMPLOYEES.
SENSITIVE MEN, PLANTS AND ANIMALS WILL REQUIRE PROTECTION. A HARD
FREEZE CAN CAUSE DAMAGE TO EXPOSED PIPES. NO YELLOW SNOW. BEGIN MAKING PLANS FOR
FOLKS THAT MIGHT NEED A LITTLE EXTRA HELP...ESPECIALLY THE
ERECTILE DYSFUNCTIONAL AND THE VERY INEXPERIENCED. EXTRA PROTECTIVE CONDOMS WILL BE
NEEDED FOR ANYONE EXPECTED TO BE INDOORS AT THESE TIMES.
VIAGRA SHORTAGES ARE EXPECTED.

DRIVERS OF MINIVANS...VW CAMPERS...HYBRIDS...AND OTHER UNMASCULINE
VEHICLES SHOULD BE ALERT TO THE DANGER OF THESE...
ESPECIALLY WHEN DRIVING WHILE TRYING TO LOOK COOL.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
844 Posts
lmao. I should get home tonight in just enough time to spray my bi**h neighbors driveway and vehicles with water.
LOL, when I lived in missouri I went and hooked up a sprinkler in a buddys front yard. It got down to single digits that night. he had a winter wonder land on his front porch the next morning.
 

·
http://talesofhumor.blogspot.com/
Joined
·
4,635 Posts
LOL, when I lived in missouri I went and hooked up a sprinkler in a buddys front yard. It got down to single digits that night. he had a winter wonder land on his front porch the next morning.
LMAO!!!!!!!! That is great!!!
 
1 - 6 of 6 Posts
Top