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"Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"
>
> "Yes, my name is Bubba, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
>
> "What sort of trouble?"
>
> "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words
>went away."
>
> "Went away?"
>
> "They disappeared."
>
> "Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
>
> "Nothing."
>
> "Nothing?"
>
> "It's a blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
>
> "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
>
> "How do I tell?"
>
> "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
>
> "What's a sea-prompt?"
>
> "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
>
> "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything
>I
>type."
>
> "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
>
> "What's a monitor?"
>
> "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
>Does
>it have a
> little light that tells you when it's on?"
>
> "I don't know."
>
> "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
>power cord goes
> into it. Can you see that?"
>
> "Yes, I think so."
>
> "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
>plugged
>into the wall."
> "Yes, it is."
>
>
> "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice th at !
>there
>we re two cables
> plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
>
> "No."
>
> "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find
>the other
> cable."
>
> "Okay, here it is."
>
> "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into
>the
>back of your
> computer."
>
> "I can't reach."
>
> "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
>
> "No."
>
> "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way
>over?"
>
> "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle it's
>because
>it's dark."
>
> "Dark?"
>
> "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is
>coming in from
> the window."
>
> "Well, turn on the office light then."
>
> "I can't."
>
> "No? Why not?"
>
> "Because there's a power failure."
>
> "A power...a power failure?... Aha, Okay, we've got it licked
>now. Do you
> still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your
>computer
>came in?"
>
> "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
>
> "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just
>like it was
> when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it
>from."
>
> "Really? Is it that bad?"
>
> "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
>
> "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"
>
> "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."
>
 

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Gee, sounds just like the conversation I had with Apple the other day!
 
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